Stressed

Why do these huge companies send all of their jobs over seas? People here in the U.S. are losing their jobs everyday, and you want to send jobs to a different country?
I tried to call T-mobile today to see about getting a discount; the guy who they put me on the phone with didn't understand a word I said. I asked him over and over to transfer me to someone else and he wouldn't!!! Grrrr!!! Needless to say I said some VERY mean things in a VERY loud voice and then I hung up on him! I just don't get it.

Anyways, off that subject. I've been so stressed lately. I have so much that I have to pay, but can't because I don't have a freakin job. Kris says he's gunna pay it, but he can't afford it. I've tried looking for a job, but nobody is hiring. I just don't know what to do anymore. All I ever do is stress out about money. Kris yells at me and tells me not too, because he is going to take care of everything. But then I have to hear him vent about being stressed out.
Kris is supposed to be leaving next month to go truck driving. Every time I think about it I just want to start crying. I hate being without him, especially at night, I hate going to sleep alone. It's going to be so hard only seeing him a couple days outta the month. I'm so used to being with him all the time. At least I'll have GSXR with me, so I wont be completely alone. I don't know how to deal with it. I don't know if I'm strong enough. When he calls home, how am I supposed to make him think that everything is fine, so that he doesn't have to worry about what is going on at home? How do I find enough strength to be strong for him and myself?

I'm gunna go lay down. I've had a long day. Talk to you soon

Busy Days

I just realized how much I have on my plate. I'm trying to start selling Avon, I'm still trying to get my Wedding Planning business off the ground, I'm looking for a "real" job, maintaining my relationship with Kris, going to church on Sundays for mass, going to church on Thursdays for a special class, and still trying to figure out how I'm going to be able to afford college. Wow, it's a lot! But, that's what I like. I like being busy. I like having so much on my plate that I have to literally plan my days out so that I have enough time to fit everything in.
I haven't got any buying customers yet for Avon. But I have a lot of people taking books from where I have set them out. I have one lady that contacted my upline to get a book. So hopefully she'll be a buying customer!
www.youravon.com/jbrown-engel

My Wedding Planning business, well I have handfulls of people visting my website a day, but nobody really wanting my services. Sorta sucks, but its good that people are visting the site! http://www.hereforyouweddings.weebly.com/

Me and Kris have been doing great! He's been thinking about going back to truck driving. Which makes me sad, of course. It means we will hardly see eachother, like going a month or two without seeing eachother. I'm so used to being with him everyday, and sleeping next to him every night. But if he decides to go, it wont be until November probably! So we have some time left.

Well back to my busy day I go. I don't have time to take a day off from my non-paying jobs, right now. LOL.

Craigslist

So, I just started talking on their forums!!! yay! I've been trying to figure out how to do it for a long time, but I finally figured it out today!!!

I just started selling Avon! I haven't made a sell yet, but I just started this week. It's fun, and it has me motivated. I get out of the house nd go places. I hope I can make some extra money doing this. I have no money, still have to pay a ticket, car insurance, and cell-phone bill. Hopefully, meet some new people and I can find some new friends.

The Holidays are just around the corner!! YAY!!! My favorite time of year. I'm thinking about posting ads on Craigslist, for making special deserts for people to take to Holiday parties and stuff. That, I think, would be a cool little way to make some extra money.

This brush set is from MARK.!!! I love it! And they come with a carry case! 5 brushes and a case for $15!! And when you order from a Representative, like myself, they usually throw in a free sample of lipstick or something like that! Usually when you take your make-up on the go, you don't have room in your purse for the brushes, and if you did the would get messed up. Now that problem is solved! Christmas isn't that far away, so start shopping for gifts now! This is a perfect gift!

Haven't written in a long time!

I know, I haven't written in a long time. But a lot has happend since the last post.



I moved back in with Kris, after my mom went through my stuff and started throwing it all away. That was after about a week of me getting my car back. I quit my job. Driving 45 minutes everyday one way to a job that only wants to pay me minimum wage, and doesn't want to give me my credit card tips; I just couldn't do it anymore.



It feels so good to be back here. To sleep with Kris and GSXR every night. We have a new addition!!! Hemi!! My Robo dwarf hampster! We went to Ohio 2 weeks ago!! I loved it! I wish we could go there more. It is so pretty there!


Well, today we went to a Green Expo in Town Center! It was pretty cool. We've been talking about building our own Earthship. They're pretty cool looking. But we'd have to move out to like New Mexico or something. They make their own power (everything is solar powered). It's so cool. I think I would be able to survive it! I'm not too sure about the heat though. I think I'd melt.

We've also been hooked on the newer show "The Colony". They put a group of people in a warehouse that has no electricity, or water, or food. and they make them try to survive. It's really cool.

Well, I'm gunna go finish watching a movie.

College?

Here I am 2 years after I've graduated high school, and I'm still not in college. My goal is to start classes in January. But its not easy. My step-dad makes too much money, so I couldn't get finacial aid. So I'm stuck with hopefully finding some good grants and scholarships and saving my money. It has taken me forever to decide what I want to go to school for. First, it was to be a lawyer. Second, Wedding Planner. Third, Inteior Designer. Fourth, Culinary Arts. Now I think i finally now what I want. Major in Event Planning and minor in Inteior Design. Then maybe do a little something in Culinary.
What I find so destrurbing, is that the government thinks your parents are supposed to pay for your college education until the age of 25 even if you don't live with them!! Where did they come up with this? My parents don't pay for anything of mine. I've been paying for everthing myself since I turned 16! I pay my own phone bill, car payment, car insurance, and everything else. So, tell me why my parents need to pay for my education?
I understand back in the days when parents did pay for their children's education. Back then, it didn't cost as much. But now, its crazy how much it cost to higher your education just to get a decent job.
I've looked into getting loans, but my credit is so bad, that I don't think I'll be able to get one. And if I could, what happens when I graduate college and then I have to start paying my loan payments, but I can't find a job? You aren't guarantee that you'll have a good paying job as soon as you graduate.

Who has it worse?

The questioon always is, who has it worse? Men or Women?

Being a women, you should know who my vote is for. The whole birthing thing, the period thing, all that.
The reason why I bring this up, is because the other day I had walked up the the little corner store. On my way home, Some man ran out of his house or his friend's house (I'm not sure which) up to me. He started asking me questions. Mind you I'm 19, pretty, and since it was hot out, I was wearing short shorts and a tank top. This is how the convo went:
"Hi, I saw you walking earlier. I think your really hot" Man
"ok" Me
"Whats your name?"Man
"You don't need to know" Me
"Do you have a boyfriend?" Man
"Yes" Me
"Do you live with him here?"Man
"No" Me
"Who do you live with?" Man
"My parents"Me
"Are they home right now?"Man
"Yes"Me
"oh. Do you want to come over to where I'm at?"Man
"No."Me
"Do you think we could go out some time?"Man
"No" Me
"Can I have your number?"Man
"No" Me
"Do you want mine?"Man
"No" Me
"Do you like older men?"Man
"Its none of your business" Me
"Are you experienced?"Man
"Do you not get the hint?"Me
"I think you're just playing hard to get"Man
"No, I'm not"Me
"Well I'll see you next time you're walking"Man.
Then he ran back to where ever he came from. Seriously, this guy was probably 35. What makes him think that I'm just gunna hook-up with him? I was scared that if it was dark out that he would have tried to rape me. Why do men do this? I just don't get it. To tell you the truth, my parents weren't home. If he would have kept foloowing me back to my house I wouldn't have gone home, I would have passed it and kept walking. Yea, my brother was there. But if that guy would have watched for him to leave, he could have broken into my house and rapped me and maybe even worse. I know people say I watch to much TV. But that really does happen to people. It mostly happens to young girls who turn guys down. Thank goodness I'm getting my car this weekend, so that this guy will never catch me walking again!

Rude Customers

As I said in another post, I work in a family owned pizzaria down the street from my parents house. I'm the cashier. Now this pizzria is a very busy, well-known, well-liked resturant. We have regulars, that come in every day, and every week. The waitresses that work there have been there for years, some have been there since the resturant opend. The customers know the waitresses by name, and what days they work. They don't even need menus and they don't have to tell the waitress what they want to drink or eat. I love it!

Now, Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays are very very busy days. Thursdays are busy because of the free car show that takes place next to the resturant every week. Fridays and Saturdays just because thats when everyone goes ou to eat.

So, last night was very busy. And it was my first time working a Thursday night. There was a waiting list with the wait time of up to 45 minutes. Now mind you, this place is small, 13 tables. So of course, there are people standing everywhere. If you were on the waiting list, you had a pager, and we would pager them when their table was ready. CLueless to us, one of the pagers would keep going off without us paging it. So when the lady and her friend came to the counter, trying to give me the pager saying it went off, I was a little shocked. I informed her that it most be a faulty one, and tried to give her another one. She looked at me like I was speaking another lanuage. so again I tried to hand her the new pager. She took it and asked how much longer the wait would be. I told her probably another 20 minutes, as for there were people on the list before her, and some who had called ahead with reservations. she finally, took it, walking away and giving me a nasty look.

Her and her friend finally got sat, and when their waitress brought them their check they handed her a coupon. Now as the cashier I have to enter the coupon on my computer and print out a new recipet for the customer. I did so. when the waitress and the customer came up to the counter, the waitress looked confussed and the customer looked pissed yet again. I asked what the problem was and if I could be of any assistants, seeming how I have more power than a waitress. The customer asked to see her coupon. I gladly went through about 20 coupon before I finally found hers. she then asked why she wasn't given half off as the coupon said it would. I looked at it and apologize. I had rang her up under the wrong coupon. When I gave her the new total, she still didn't understand why it wasn't coming to half off. In small print of the coupon, it said up to a value of $7.95. She didn't understand, so I explained it again to her. She finally through her and her friends credit cards on the counter and demanded it split the check down the middle . So I did, with a smile on my face, and apologizing about the coupon misuderstanding. She finally walked back to her table, and when the waitress followed to see if they needed a box, I could see they were bombing the waitress with questions about the coupon. I never got a chance to ask what they had been asking. But by the look on the waitress' face when she was walking away from the table, I could tell that the two laddies had not been very nice.

I just don't understand why people have to be so rude. If you can see that there are 20 people standing around waiting for a table, don't be rude when you have to wait. When you can see the that the cashier, not only runs credit cards, puts in coupons, and fixes tabs for the waitress, but answers a multi-line phone, placing phone orders, placing window orders, handing food out to pick-up customers, makes salads for the whole resturant, and is the owners right-hand girl, why give me an attitude? You can clearly see, I have one of the hardest jobs in the whole building (which is the clear reason why we only have two counter girls).

So, after impressing my boss last night, for handling the rushes and the calmness I kept through the whole night, I might be the sole counter girl. The other counter girl, who is also a waitress for the resturant, gets very frustranted very very easily.

But anywho, if you decide to go to a busy resturant to eat, please give the girls a break. You don't see what goes on behind the scenes. You don't see it, because it's our job that you dont know about it. It's your job to not let you see any form of chaus. So please, please, please be nice. Take care of your servers becasue they take care of you. Thank you.

Me and the Open Road

As I'm sitting here burning CDs for the roadtrip, I just can't help but think of how free, independent, and in control I am going to feel. Nobody there to criticize the chooses I will make. Nobody there to yell at me. Nobody there. Just me and the Open Road. I'll have control of the wheel.

For once in my life, I'll be completly alone. I'll be abe to think with an open mind. I'll be able to make clear decisions about what I'm going to do with my life. I can't wait.

I can't wait to have the wind blowing in my face and my radio blarring. I'll be singing as loud as I can to the tunes coming out of my speakers. To be honest, I've waited for this moment for a long time. To be alone. To rely on nobody.

Tryin' to Hustle, Tryin' to get the Cash Flow

In order for my to get my car insurance, I have to make a $458.77 down-payment (the cheapest deal I could find, after spending a whole day on the phone with every insurance company known to man-kind). I have $160 saved, and hopefully my next check will be $300 or a little over, so that I can atleast pay for the insurance. But I still have no idea how I am going to buy gas, which I guesstamted $150. I'm hoping that my parents will offer to pay for it, or my mom in Texas will pay for it. Or guess what, I'm not getting my car!!!

So, to say the least, I'm just a little stressed out. But I'm still hoping that everything will work-out for me. It still sucks, but what am I gunna do? Ya know?

Well, its time for my to get ready for work. Hopefully I can make some killer tips tonight!! Wish me luck!

My Big Event (one day)

I've been thinking a lot about hosting my own "Big Event". I want it to be super chic, and I want lots of women, maybe some guys, deff some gays. I've been leaning more towards a more girly event. I would love to find an up and coming clothing designer or someone who just started thier own make-up line. I want a cocktail hour vibe, but the age group to be 18 and up.

In the goody bag, I'd add a sample of the make-up, or a shirt if a clothing designer. The book "The Bad Girls Guide to the Open Road" or one of Cameron Tuttle's other "Bad Girls Guide" books. Maybe some coupons to certain stores.

The color theme would deff be pinks. It would take place at a very cool place, a dress code would be in place. A dress-up event! Pink carpet entry (already checked this out, yes it is possible). Have a signature pink drink, both acholoic and non. I already picked-up the invitations, and I haven't an idea on how to set this up, and haven't the money to do so either!!

I've always wanted to start my own event planning business, and I think if I was/am able to pull this off, I'd be really able to start that business.

Stay tuned for more updates!

Book Review

I went yesturday to Barnes & Nobles and got the book "The Bad Girls Guide to te Open Road"!!! OMG! For $15, this was a great, fabulous buy!! The book is full of laughs, tips, cool destionations, and a fresh look into a new way of living life!

I couldn't put the book down. As soon as I got home I started reading it. I read it till I went to sleep, and picked it up to read as soon as I woke up!! This is a book for any girl over the age of 16!! I'm thinking about buying it as gifts for a few friends.

I wanted to save the read for the airplane, but I just couldn't resist. I might pick up another one of her books for the flight, or I just might read this one over again! Girls, Go get this book today! Sit down, and be ready to read this book cover to cover in one sitting!

The Bad Girls Guide To The Open Road

So, I was on another blog site earlier and saw many posting sabout a book titled "The Bad Girls Guide To The Open Road". So after reading the great reviews about it, I'm going to Barnes & Nobles today to pick it up. It comes with a bumper sticker too!! I'll deffinatly write a review about it. Sounds like the perfect read for the airplane ride to Texas!!

Road Trip Checklist

So, I have started my checklist for my little roadtrip, that is getting closer and closer!!! I Googled "Things to do for a roadtrip" and wow. People have lists upon lists about this, and how to pack, how to plan, what to bring, even activities to do if you have kids. It's great.

I spent the weekend at Kris'. He has his car torn apart. The whole interior was ripped out, headliner and carpet, and seats, the whole thing. He is putting in a whole stereo system. But, I got to help him. Which I love to do. I don't get to do any of the big stuff. I just get him drinks, tools, if he loses something I'll find it for him. I don't think it is actually helping, but he says it does. But I think he just says it to make me feel better. I think he just wants me to be out there to keep him company.

I gotta work tonight, and I really don't want too. I'm a cashier at a little pizzaria. See the cashiers used to not really have a uniform. I wore jean pants and a nice short sleeve shirt. But since the other cashier couldn't be respectful, and would look like she just got off the beach, the owner made us go by uniforms. Long dressy black pants, long sleeve collared button down shirt, and a grey tie. It gets sooo hot while working!!! It sucks!!

Well, all I can think about s me getting m car back, and beingg able to go and do whatever I want, whenever I want!!

My Make-Up Kit

So this is my everyday make-up kit. actually this is, sadly, all the make-up I own as of right now. The polka-dot case in the background is what I keep it in. I keep it in my purse at all times. You never know when you'll need to apply it.

My New Obesession

So, I found my new obsession!!! Make-up!!!

I've found a great web-site that has a lot of tip, and swapping, and fourms all about make-up!! WWW.makeuptalkcom!! It's great! i just found it a couple hours ago and I cant get away from it. I love it!

In my spare time, while I'm sitting in my room, I try different ways to do my make-up. But on a very very small budget I only have black, grey, silver, and white eyeshadows. So The make-up isn't very dramatic. Plus, my wardrobe isn't up to par either. But thats going to change soon. As soon as I get my car back, and i start making some extra cash, I'm going to start updating it.

What I do is, while looking through friend's photos on myspace, and on other sites I save pictures of clothing items, or images of someones make-up if I like them. My little wish list!!!

Work has been going good. I started only working Mon-Wed 4-10. But last week they added Thursday. And then Tuesday night my boss told me that I might start working Saturdays also. YAY, more money! But When I get my car I'm going to get a day job waitressing somewhere, hopefully. Just so I can have cash on hand. I could pay bills with my night job at the pizzaria, and spend/save with the day job!

Well back to the make-up talk I go!!!

The Big Day

So, I'm finally getting my car back. I'll been without it for 10 months!! I fly out of Orlando on the 31st at 7:05 am, and arrive in Austin, TX at 10:30 am. I'm gunna sleep all day, then Saturday morning wake up early. Then hit the road and head back home to FL!!!

I'm just a little stressed about it. I have to make $500 dollars for insurance before I get the car, and I have to get about $150 in gas. I've made the trip from Texas to Florida before, but I had someone with me, and i had a GPS. But this time, I'm going to be alone. And I just sold my GPS, two days before I found out that i was getting the car back.

When I get my car, I'll finally be able to get a second job! Hopefully, I can find one waitressing somewhere during the day, then go work the at the pizzaria at night.

I'm trying to get my own place. But Kris dropped a bomb on me the other day. He said after I get my second job, he wants me to move back in with him. I'm not sure what I'm gunna do. A very very big part of me, wants to get my own place, and be able to take care of myself. But another part of me wants, to live with him again. I miss seeing him everyday, and sleeping with him at night. I miss my puppy! But I don't want to put myself in the position of me and him getting in a big fight, and him kicking me out again, and me having no where to go all over again!

I don't know what I'm going to do. First thing is first, I'm gunna get my car, and get a second job. Then I'll start thinking about what i'm going to do about living with him or not.